Since John Baur invented National Talk Like A Pirate Day in 1995, the 19th of September annually has been such day. A day that landlubbers of all ages exchange their native tongue and lexicon, for that of a Swashbuckler (at least some do). I felt it was only fitting I submit my article about today’s Pirate victory… as a Pirate, Arrrrr!
Pirate’s Capn’ Clint Hurdle must’ve shouted “Show a Leg” (to wake the sleeping Pirates) fore the days battle, ’cause th’ band ‘o Pirates came up big ’tis afternoon as th’ squelched a three battle losin’ streak ‘n swashbuckling th’ Padres 10-1.
Neil Walker ‘n Jose Tabata each plundered three RBI a piece, while Walker ‘n Pedro Alvarez each went out of the shipyard. Th’ Pittsburgh nine explodid’ fer fourteen hits ‘n ten runs, while lad Gerrit Cole went six strong innin’s strikin’ out a career high 12 batters.
Cole allowed only one run, ‘n th’ relief ‘o Watson, Grillie ‘n Pimentel threw up zeros. Th’ win in front ‘o 26,242 Jolly Roger wavin’ maties lowered th’ Bucs magic number to four in order to clinch a post season birth. Th’ band ‘o pirates now have a one battle lead over th’ Reds in th’ Wild Card race, ‘n still trail th’ Cardnils by one fer th’ division title. All that’s left befor e th’ autumn winds blow in off ‘o th’ mighty Allegheny ‘n th’ band ‘o pirates enter th’ Post Season fer th’ first the hour since 1992, be six games vs th’ Reds, ‘n three agaist th’ Cubs.
Yo-ho-ho I be needin’ to be a scurvy Pirate wit me bottle of Rum!